The Sweet Spot

Last week, I went to the park with my friends and our kids.  4 moms; 8 kids.  Our big kids ran around the park, playing “near” each other and sometimes “with” each other.  My friend nursed her 8 week old while watching her twins.  How we were able to have a conversation, I’ll never know.  But, we were able to chat.  I kept one eye on my toddler and the other on my 7 month old.  My baby was all over the blanket, crawling toward those wood chips.  Picking up a bunch and trying to put them in her mouth.  I was consistently picking her up and moving her to the middle of the blanket.  Repeat.  But, I didn’t mind it.  I was with my friends and we all were doing the same thing.  We were all in wonderful disarray. 

It was a hot day but it was good morning, because I realized something.  As I was getting the kids out of the car and into the house for lunch, I realized…I can do this.

It was chaos in the beginning.  The witching hour…god help us.  My newborn would scream from 5:30-6:30 pm every night for a few weeks.  And then when she got over that, she would want to be held constantly.  I would be cooking dinner with the baby in the bjourn and burning my wrist on the stove.  War wound.   I remember calling my husband and begging him to catch the earlier train.  “I need help,” I would say.  “This isn’t easy,” juggling a newborn and a toddler.  My baby was and is a very vocal baby.  The cries.  The whines.  She’s not afraid to “voice” her opinion.  And, at the time, my toddler was adjusting.    

But now, everything is slowing down; stabilizing.  We have a groove.  My toddler has become extremely independent and my baby and I have gotten to know each other.  I know what she likes.  I know the ins and outs.  I know her.   I love the time it takes to get to truly know your child.  As their personality develops, so does your understanding of them; and that is when it becomes easy. 

 I find joy in learning what makes my baby tick.  When I want to make her laugh, I can tickle her under her arm.  I realized that she likes to be around others.  I found out that she will never complain at the grocery store.  Interesting.  Sometimes I will take a 5pm trip to the grocery store because I can.  I know that she will stop whining the moment I take her outside.  It took a while, but I finally found it; the sweet spot.  And it is so juicy!!!   Because now, I don’t fear going out at random times.  I know I won’t get random screaming.  She is 8 months now, and she is a little lady.  And I’m….getting the hang of it.

I remember finding the sweet spot with my first daughter when she was about 5 months old.  It took a while to get over the initial shock of a different life; the slower pace.  But, I remember the moment it hit me.  I thought to myself, I found it; my groove.  And now, I have found it again.  The Sweet Spot is the moment when everything changes.  Life settles down.  When you look at your one child, or two children, or 3 or 4….and say to yourself, I’ve got this. 

The sweet spot is so delightful because it is the place where life becomes more than manageable; it becomes enjoyable!