"I've Done My Job"

A couple of months ago, I asked a friend who had recently become a stay-at-home mom if she liked it.  “Yes,” she responded instantly.  “If my baby points to a cow and says MOO, I’ve done my job.”  That statement resonated with me.  Here I am, 2 months later and still thinking about that comment.  Sometimes people can just say things that shine something inside you.  That comment made me feel fortunate but more than that, it made me feel happy inside.  Yes, if my baby says MOO, I’ve done my job.  It was a small statement, but huge in theory.  It probably was a thoughtless comment, but one with much thought and contemplation from within.

My 16 month old points to her head when prompted, says please through sign language, and can shake her hips on command.  She can tell me she is all done with her food when she moves her hands back and forth.  I did that.  My 3 year old says please and thank you as second nature, is a good listener at school and likes to take care of her animals and baby dolls like a little mommy.  She learned the good stuff watching me.  She sings the alphabet.  She counts and can start to sound out words.  She got that from me.  The time I spend sitting at the table with her alphabet fries, putting together words, that is when I’m doing my job.  That is when I’m working the hardest and it is paying off.  I’m doing it.  It’s working.  So far so good.  I’ve done my job.

On the flip side, the idea that we are shaping them is wonderfully scary as well.  Yesterday my friend’s daughter asked my daughter to push her on the swing.  “Umm,” she responded, “Oh,” she hesitated, “Ok, I guess,” and shrugged her shoulders.   I cringed a little and then laughed a little.  I have responded like that to her probably a hundred times.  YUCK!  I can see the things that I need to work on through my daughter’s responses and reactions.  Ok, I’m doing my job and sometimes I’m not watching my step.  It is coming out through the sponge that is my 3 year olds brain. 

Mental note: work on my reactions when I don’t want to do something…

…And so on and so forth.  I probably could have a list of 50 things that I need to change that I have seen through my daughter.  Don’t raise my voice; stop frowning when I’m thinking about everything I need to get done, STOP rolling my eyes.  What am I 12?  I’m on duty all the time.  I have to remember that.  SMILE NOREEN!  I want to have a good performance review this year.  Miss C and Miss K are taking notes.

No matter what we do in life, if we are raising children, we are on duty.  They are watching and learning from the things we do, reactions we have, and the way we act.  Everyday life is the test.  The other moments are the fall out.  So, when my daughter has a freak out at a Christmas parade because she wants to be doing something else, I have to look into myself for the answer on how to fix her reaction going forward.  It isn’t her.  It is me.  I’m the one doing the job.  They are the ones reaping the benefits from it…or not. 

So, let’s all go to work today with a smile on our face.  Our bosses are watching us intently!