Beyond Ordinary
Two of my friends just gave birth to baby girls a couple of
days apart. This is all happening as I’m
saying to my girls, “No roughhousing in the tub.” My friend was in labor last night and I’m
saying the word, “Roughhousing.” They
are starting at the beginning and I am knee deep in ‘roughhousing’
children. I am not even sure if people still
use this word but it floated out of my mouth as easy as “playdate,” (something
else I never thought I’d say). As these
words pass my lips, the girl that walked into college orientation with short
white shorts officially disappears, for good.
Someone else entirely emerges with a stern voice and gray hairs. (Well,
maybe not gray hairs…I highlight). Anyway,
despite bath time craziness, I am thinking about how amazing it all is; childbirth;
friends having babies, etc. I think
about 19 months ago when my second baby girl arrived and almost 4 years since my first. Then I think about how
far away I am from all that. We are
getting to a place that feels normal; something my husband and I are soaking up
and enjoying; being out of the baby stage.
I say this because my husband and I recently got home from a
5 day vacation in Antigua. It was
well-needed. The first day, we literally
didn’t stop blabbing all day long, in the crystal blue water jumping waves, at
dinner on the water, and sitting on the beach on chaise lounges. BLABBING!
We caught up. We also put our
business arrangement to the side. I say
the statement ‘business arrangement’ because sometimes that is what it feels
like. “You take her to the store, while
I take the other one to pick up ____ (fill in blank). “You do bath tonight and I’ll do it tomorrow.” “Can you take out the garbage?” “Did you see that crusty pan in the sink? Yours.”
Etc. It feels like a business
arrangement sometimes or that we are passing ships in the night. He comes home with tired eyes and walks in
the room to see my arm draped across my forehead, sprawled out on the
couch. Done. (Exaggerated for point). He takes one to bed and I take the other (the
easier one) and then come downstairs and then pull the blanket up to my ears. So anyway, this trip was all about checking
in, reconnecting, holding hands, talking, and remembering where it all began. We talked about the old days as well as the
new ones. We talked about before we were
parents and after. It is something every
couple should do from time to time.
Check in.
When we got home, I couldn’t wait to hear the news from my 2
girlfriends who were having baby girls.
I wanted to know every detail. I can
imagine every moment and feeling. And
although my husband and I were so far away from it, both literally and
figuratively, I still felt an unimaginable amount of joy and hope for my
friends, as if it was my own...so close to home. The feeling of meeting your new child is a
feeling that never ceases to amaze. And
it makes me think about them constantly, even now. The baby stage is hard but it is also a
blur. Soon enough, their children will
be ‘roughhousing’ in the tub. Pretty
soon, they will be where we are, checking in with their spouses after months
and months of long, hard days. I’ve known one of my friends since 7th grade
and the other I met as a mom but I love them just the same. We are ordinary women, mothers. We haven’t won Oscars or Emmy’s. We haven’t starred in any reality show down
the shore or anywhere else. But, when I
think about how much we have been through, where we have come from, and where
we may go, life to me seems beyond ordinary, it feels extraordinary.
I say this because my husband and I recently got home from a
5 day vacation in Antigua. It was
well-needed. The first day, we literally
didn’t stop blabbing all day long, in the crystal blue water jumping waves, at
dinner on the water, and sitting on the beach on chaise lounges. BLABBING!
We caught up. We also put our
business arrangement to the side. I say
the statement ‘business arrangement’ because sometimes that is what it feels
like. “You take her to the store, while
I take the other one to pick up ____ (fill in blank). “You do bath tonight and I’ll do it tomorrow.” “Can you take out the garbage?” “Did you see that crusty pan in the sink? Yours.”
Etc. It feels like a business
arrangement sometimes or that we are passing ships in the night. He comes home with tired eyes and walks in
the room to see my arm draped across my forehead, sprawled out on the
couch. Done. (Exaggerated for point). He takes one to bed and I take the other (the
easier one) and then come downstairs and then pull the blanket up to my ears. So anyway, this trip was all about checking
in, reconnecting, holding hands, talking, and remembering where it all began. We talked about the old days as well as the
new ones. We talked about before we were
parents and after. It is something every
couple should do from time to time.
Check in. 
When we got home, I couldn’t wait to hear the news from my 2
girlfriends who were having baby girls.
I wanted to know every detail. I can
imagine every moment and feeling. And
although my husband and I were so far away from it, both literally and
figuratively, I still felt an unimaginable amount of joy and hope for my
friends, as if it was my own...so close to home. The feeling of meeting your new child is a
feeling that never ceases to amaze. And
it makes me think about them constantly, even now. The baby stage is hard but it is also a
blur. Soon enough, their children will
be ‘roughhousing’ in the tub. Pretty
soon, they will be where we are, checking in with their spouses after months
and months of long, hard days. I’ve known one of my friends since 7th grade
and the other I met as a mom but I love them just the same. We are ordinary women, mothers. We haven’t won Oscars or Emmy’s. We haven’t starred in any reality show down
the shore or anywhere else. But, when I
think about how much we have been through, where we have come from, and where
we may go, life to me seems beyond ordinary, it feels extraordinary. 
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