Man Up!

My husband had to work last Sunday.  What? He sat in our bed with his laptop on his lap, shut the door, and worked.  So, where did that leave me?  Soothing a teething 7 month old and entertaining a boisterous 2 ½ year old.  You know, the usual.  Monday through Friday, I’m on duty.  It’s my job and I love it.  Thankfully, I am blessed with the ability to take care of my children full-time.  And, I have to say that because it’s true.  I am truly blessed.  We made some sacrifices so that I could do it.  With that said, “what the F*#$?”  Having to do Monday’s work on a Sunday is just plain foul.  I need time away from situation and help.  So, I stomped my feet by the door, lingering and letting the baby’s cries echo in the hallway, and whined and complained to no one, loud enough for him to hear.  Let’s be real, he doesn’t need to hear it.  He is working hard to provide for our family.  But, I felt extremely bitter. In fact, it ruined my Sunday.  Yet, the truth is, I really did just need to… “Man Up!”

I mean, I feel bad for my husband.  He has to deal with the day to day tedious routine of getting up at 5:15, taking the train, working his butt off, and then coming home at 7.  And when he comes home, he has an extension of my day.  Sometimes, he walks into a very calm and playful atmosphere, and other times, well…hell on earth.  His work doesn’t end for him at the door, it begins.  And, as I put the baby to sleep, he has to bathe our toddler and get her into bed.  After a long day, it is the last thing he wants to do, I’m sure.  And so, he has to bite his tongue, find that energy, and… “Man Up!”      

I must say, this isn’t a Noreen vs. Chris thing though; it is a mom vs. dad thing.  It is universal.  So, when I give him crap for working on a Sunday or having to stay late on a weekday, deep down I know I have no place to say these things.  This is life.  It is a job for both of us.  A hard job.  And we both don’t quite understand each other’s realities.  I don’t know what it is like to be a part of a small team-oriented company and then find time for family and balance.  And, he doesn’t understand or know what it is like to take care of 2 children, (girls mind you), 24 hours a day, seven days a week, with no break to mentally decompress.  The truth is we would gladly swap places with each other at times.  He would love to change diapers (he would, he told me) and I would gladly shut the door and sit on the bed with my laptop.  But, it just cannot happen.  And, as we all know, the grass is always greener on the other side.   After all, isn’t this what we signed up for when we decided to have kids?  Isn’t this the American dream; to have a family and children to love?  We know these are the tough years.  And it is true.  Our mothers tell us the same thing.  “You know,” they say, “it gets easier.”  We know.  But for now….

All we have to do is get through it.  Try and keep some sort of balance.  Have fun with it.  Enjoy it. At times, grin and bear it.  And always, “Man up!”